The vile owner of the business is accused of beating a Brooksider after the homeowner removed 'Mr. Falls' signs placed there for discounted tree trimming four weeks ago. After berating the homeowner for removing the signs, lying about the terms the signs were to be used, refusing to leave the homeowner's property, and failing to goad the Brooksider into a fight, the belligerent bully struck the homeowner in the head and drove off. The easy way out of an assault and battery charge in Tulsa, Oklahoma? 'Mr. Falls' issued a false statement (a crime) to the cops, saying the homeowner struck him, too, and that 'Mr. Falls' had witnesses. Patently, demonstrably false, the lies (both being crimes) were enough for the police to threaten the homeowner - the victim - with jail, and so two Civil Servants let yet another violent jerk free to menace Tulsans!

Evidently, there is so much crime and disorder in our City at the neighborhood level that our Civil Servants are overwhelmed and undermanned, unable to investigate properly the target-rich environment of thugs and vandals that roam our once fair streets. In short, we are not in Bedford Falls anymore, Tulsan, we are in the glorious world of Pottersville. We agree with the overwhelming sentiment of law enforcement officers, that the last thing one should ever do is put oneself in the position of having to ever - under circumstance - cost the taxpayer one penny by depending on a Civil Servant to enforce the Law; indeed, if stupid people would not do stupid things, Sworn Officers of the Law would be unnecessary!

The victim speaks: "Yeah, but to have just been head-butted by the guy like, ten minutes ago, having him ['Mr. Falls'] shouting in my face like taht, and then to see him ['Mr. Falls'] over there just laughing at me, with some punk cop leaning against his car just nodding, laughing, too, kind of sneering, 'Yeah,' he says, 'it is pretty stupid to have to get involved between two adults.' I couldn't believe it. Some mother fucker in an Ohio truck with a 1-800 number, man, and they were just taking his word for it all, you know, like I was the piece of shit."

Strong words, to be sure, but further investigation would find that the 'victim' opened the door to his house, placing himself and his family at grave risk. That tactical error cost the taxpayers valuable resources, but could have cost much, much more! "[REDACTED:COP] told me that the dude had witnesses that I hit him, and so if I pressed charges he was too and we would both be arrested. I tried to find out what the fuck the guy told the cop but the cop just like would not answer any questions, was like, that's it. Not even who he said swung first, nothing. I was furious."

The homeowner explains, "All they had to do was compare stories, ask the crew what they saw, where they were, where he was, when they got there, and it would be obvious that someone was lying. The tree crew was two blocks away, they pulled right up on the west side of the street on Rockford to work on that house about the time I called the police department, because when I walked across to get his tag number they [tree crew] weren't there [36th/Rockford]."

"When I crossed the street he had moved away from the house, but still positioned between me and the open front door and so I was walking around him until I had a straight line into the door and takes a couple steps and BAM! He slams his forehead into my left brow - if it had been an inch or two lower he would have just creamed my nose. I stumble backward and he takes another step and flinches like he is going to hit me again with both hands but stops. You know, I startle a little bit a back off. He just shouts something else, and stands there just glaring at me with this evil fucking smile, like he was glad I was scared." The 'victim's eyes swell and lip quivered. "He started freaking laughing, like he enjoyed it, but didn't do anything, but he has this red blackbery, and he takes my picture. Like a fucking trophy."

OUR ADVICE: NEVER EVER OPEN THE DOOR, [REDACTED:ADVICE], ALWAYS GRAB YER GUN, AND BE READY TO STAND YOUR GROUND!